Piano Plays Last Song, Investor Be Flattened

ABF Newswire: December 9, 2025

A very rushed and poorly executed forced perspective drawing of a man under a raised piano by a building with laughing faces in the window.

Image Credit: My Id and Ego.

Better. That's some okay progress on the perspective. I phoned in the color. Yes I did. I don't know why I'm afraid to try harder with getting better colors. Maybe it's because I don't have a reference image and I'm trying to realize an image that's still not fully formed in my head. Yes! I think I should focus on using reference pictures and tweaking those a tiny bit before I try to paint fully from imagination. Why does he look ripped? Because I suck at people still. Keep practicing.

NEW YORK, NEW YORK. December 9, 2025 (ABF Newswire) – A partner in one of the city's top investment firms was crushed and killed by a falling piano this afternoon. The incident occurred at the man's residence where a piano was to be lifted to his penthouse balcony for a party this weekend.

Longtime resident of the posh neighborhood, Betty Wisniewski, was walking her dog nearby when the incident happened. "It was quite a loud crash. You'd think a body would have muffled the sound with some cushion, but nope, the noise scared my poor Buttercup during our walk and I had to carry her home. It's a shame about that piano." And her dog? "Buttercup's all better after some cuddles and treats."

The moving supervisor on scene, Joe Surely, or "Surly J" as his crew calls him, was visibly upset about the incident. "Twenty some odd years moving big and small and an act of God ruins a perfect record. At least I don't have to ask for a user review for this move."

A very rushed and poorly executed forced perspective drawing of a man under a raised piano by a building with laughing faces in the window.

Image Credit: My Id & Ego.

Oh me. This is what happens when I don't plan and simply want to fulfill the urge to draw something. There's too much to nitpick with this version... The reference pose I used for the man was wrong – he shouldn't look like he's running. Nor should he look like he's running uphill toward a low-hanging swinging piano. The clownish faces were an afterthought, a "fuck it, in for a penny" effort to extend the poor execution. I do like the dark touch they add.

The deceased's firm was a lead investor in a recent push to merge three of the nation's largest grocery chains into one. The merger would have wiped out regional competitors and given the new combined chain enough leverage over suppliers to dictate terms no small producer could refuse. When the FTC tried to block it, the firm quietly funded a legal advocacy group that filed amicus briefs arguing that consumer prices would actually go down. They wouldn't have. The case is still pending.

The police investigation found no malicious intent and the death ruled an accident by falling piano. All stock indexes closed positive this evening.

A couple of rough sketches to practice forced perspective. The view is looking up from below a person with a piano lifted above them.

Image Credit: My Id & Ego.

It is frustrating to have an idea in my head and not be able to simply whip out a beautiful sketch. This type of forced perspective and odd angles will take some practice. Yes. Practice. Beacuase poopy pants in the top left wasn't intended. Yes. I don't know if pooped pants is a level of detail we need to shoot for yet.