Boys Jump Bikes Over Dead Body Obstacle
Three watercolor sketches of kids on bikes. A couple of them jumping bikes, and one of a group riding. Very remedial watercolor.

Id and Ego Babble

My process with tutorials:
1. Watch tutorial.
2. Ignore most of the tutorial and try my own way. If I had paid attention to the paint people the easy way type tutorial, maybe I would have realized sooner that brush strokes that hint of something can be effective. The bike I tried to detail in version one sucks. The less defined strokes in version three are more effective.Maybe I'm onto something by my stubborn learning process. Or I'm wasting time. I enjoyed these attempts, even the frustrating parts in all of them. That's what matters. Mental note: When I get better at people, I need to remember to try to paint or draw the $2 kid from Better Off Dead.

Image Created:

Meta Data

Title

Local Boys Use Dead Body as a Fun Bike Jumping Obstacle

Description

I miss the days of riding bikes and jumping rickety ramps made out of scrap wood. Would I have jumped a dead body with my buddies if we came across one? Probably not. Who knows about kids these days and the urge to post radical stuff to the socials. If I ever feel bad about the content I post to this site, I remind myself there's greedy people out there perfectly content with starving children as long as their profits go up. That's, like, one of the tamest examples I can think of. We're a sad species in many ways.

Image

600x size: Three watercolor sketches of kids on bikes. A couple of them jumping bikes, and one of a group riding. Very remedial watercolor.

Date

Saturday, February 28, 2026

Modified

n/a

Inspiration

Local Boys Use Dead Body as a Fun Bike Jumping Obstacle

ABF Newswire: February 28, 2026

Editors Note: Last names have been omitted to protect the minors involved.

WASHINGTON, D.C. February 28, 2026 (ABF Newswire) A group of neighborhood boys found an interesting obstacle to jump their bikes over: a dead body.

According to the group of boys, they were riding their bikes around a new construction site on the quest for wood scraps to build a jump. Not only did they find the wood remnants for their launch pad, they stumbled across an exciting obstacle.

"We didn't know what it was so we poked it with a stick," shared one of the boys, Scott.

"It didn't move so we jumped it!" interjected an excited Randy. "It's already got a few thousand views on my TikTok."

The deceased was identified as a head of a national real estate investment firm. Per the company secretary, he was in Washington for a business meeting and was declared missing when he didn't make his private jet flight later that day.

The coroner's report indicates the body was riddled with gunshot wounds and also badly mangled, as if thrown from a moving vehicle and run over multiple times. The death was ruled an accident due to stray bullets.

The deceased's firm surreptitiously secures warehouse leases across the U.S. by routing each transaction through different Delaware LLCs and law firms. As a leading patron of the American Correctional Association and a quiet benefactor to three senators on the Homeland Security Appropriations subcommittee, he successfully lobbied to gut medical-care audit requirements and secure lucrative per-diem contracts for the mass detention facilities the government was rapidly expanding. These publicly funded detention centers are used for any population a future executive order might designate as a threat including migrants, protesters, political dissidents, poor people... any of us.

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